Managing Divorce Pressure

Managing divorce pressure on top of everything else can seem like another thing to add to your list.

Here I share with you thoughts to help you alleviate divorce pressure and access those all important moments of calm.

• Breathing practice for stress relief

You might want to just for a couple of minutes, just set an alarm for two minutes, making sure that you're not going to be interrupted. And just taking several deep breaths for as long as you need to, down into your belly (which triggers the body's natural relaxation response).

• Get into the Habit of Checking in With Yourself!

What we're going to be doing is forming habits and all of these if checking in with yourself. writing in a note, maybe on your bathroom mirror, maybe on your cattle, just to check in with yourself.

How am I feeling? Yeah. How is my body feeling? Can I stretch? Do I need to drink some more water, eat something or perhaps take a 5 minute break?

• Respond, rather than React

Reacting is something that happens when we are on automatic pilot, it happens when we are triggered. I know we have to react sometimes if a child's injured, but if it's on the back of something that's done or said to us, we have a choice, we can learn by taking a breath we get ourselves in to a more calmer, wiser place to think clearly and then are better able to respond.

Go make a cup of tea or coffee, go for a walk around the block or you can sit on the email or message for 15 minutes. Try to do something else to take your mind off automatic pilot (thought stream) and what is most stressing you.

• Reclaim your calmness

When we give ourselves that space, to come back into ourselves, rather than being in our heads with noisy thoughts, we become more conscious and aware of whether we are reacting and we can choose to respond instead. Try to be aware of how your body is feeling when it comes to pressure, it is your best barometer so begin to notice where in your body stress is making itself known - in your jaw, shoulders or shallow breathing.

If the pressure is too much for you and lasts for a long period of time, this can cause chronic stress. This is where you need to be more mindful. Too much stress for a long period of time can impact on your overall health, so get good at checking in with yourself. You can manage periods of stress when you give yourself time to reclaim your sense of balance and calm.

Listen to the full episode below!

Book : Kindness for Conflict

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